2012-A New Beginning

I don't think the earth will be destroyed this year, partly because a lot of people think it will and that makes me think it won't. I had the privilege of ringing in the new year with friends, really wonderful friends. I am blessed beyond measure.

I have been asked by a number of people what new years resolutions I have. I didn't really just a lot of things I want to do. However, I decided that I will make one, one big one.

I will go to Africa this year somewhere on that continent. I will hug a child, smile into a weathered face and close my eyes and breathe deep of a sprawling land that is covered in people that are more beautiful than I can imagine. It scares me in ways I don't understand. I kindof don't want to go for fear it will be less than I have dreamed. Regardless that is the resolution. To go, not to stay but to step out and say Here I am.

It is going to be a life changing, stretching, tough, exhilarating year!

Cheers! You better have a drink, we are going to need it.

Grey Skies

Today was ho hum. You know those days when nothing special really sticks out it just is. I usually dislike those type of days but today was really good. I am growing to love just being, not really being productive allowing myself time to think, decreasing those expectations I have for myself. The accomplishment of the day, I am now a member of the YMCA of greater charlotte. It has been a ho hum good day. Hoping for better sleep....Goodnight.

And now for something completely different...

I feel different. Things are changing. My perspective, my hours, my relationships.

Different is hard. Different is exciting.

I feel like I am in a state of learning again and not just surviving. I feel more peace and am slowing down. I worry less than this time last year.

Different is colorful. Different is questioning.

There is a lot of potential ahead. So much so that it scares me, I become slightly paralyzed and stop working towards a goal. Sometimes I forget to restart.

Different is heavy. Different is delicious.

Work is heavy emotionally, some weeks more than others. I am starting to see the beauty in normal, topsy turvy life.

Different is freeing. Different is painful.

The concept of pain and how we deal with it is a deep ocean. A strange relationship exists between pain and growth, I am going to learn more.

A beginning is really different.